The Anatomy of a Grudge..

I know grudges don’t have anatomies…. per se but you know I thought this title was nice…. .

So I’ve been going on and on about thinking how life in general sucked, how people just weren’t nice and had it in for me.. I was dreading an upcoming meeting…. Anticipating nothing good out of it, after all that lady wasn’t concerned about my wellbeing…but I couldn’t put it off any longer and it happened…it wasn’t too bad at the outset, and further on into the meeting I found out that the person who had it in for me actually went out of the way to do something I really wanted to have happen ;but didn’t imagine ever would. How cool was that?

I guess I came out of the incident thinking that though people may not be the best , everyone is mostly good ….that’s what makes us human..

So what if someone totally ruined you life ??( and believe me they have!!)..it doesn’t mean that they can’t treat you to an ice cream some time ..I guess its not black or white, good and bad , its all grey…. I’ve held grudges and not spoken to people for years on end( extremely childish I know , I usually did the silent treatment thing as a kid ) anyway it would have gone on and on ( me not speaking to them) but the universe had other plans and one way or the other I was made to patch up.. which wasn’t such a bad thing ..because the negative energy due to these bad vibes is really draining!!! But can things go back to how they were before ??? I know I may be this highly enlightened soul ;)…. But what about the other person? Will they go back to thinking I’m a doormat ..and therein lies the conflict of truly forgiving and forgetting….

I have learned something though , before I would have called this appreciation of the fact that everyone has good and bad points ( though it may seem at times that the bad outweighs the good ), and being good to people even if you can't really stand them Hypocrisy, now I realize it isn’t as clean cut as all that…. Howard Roarkism takes a back seat for a while I guess…….