The Lake House/ IL MARE

Speaking about letters across time, check out Keanu Reeves’ and Sandra Bullock’s upcoming movie The Lake House … ** Warning – Spoiler details in the link**, you know I guess the Korean film it’s based on was quite popular because I’m sure I’ve heard about the plot before ..infact why don’t you just read a review for the original movie – Il Mare.

Letter to a younger me

Ok since I did that whole writing to my future self thing , I thought I may as well write a letter to my younger self , Richard Bach did believe that in some way we could communicate with our past selves, you know I’m not saying that I believe this, I definitely haven’t experienced it, but its an interesting idea and its out there, more than actually reaching out to their younger selves people have written books and blogs on this topic so that others can learn from their experiences…

Ok so here goes :

Dear Younger Self :
Don’t do things much different from how you do already.
Choose which people’s opinion you value and listen to them, the rest can go in one ear and out the other.
Try to be a bit more diplomatic
Maintain a diary.
Don’t stress out things work out in the end .
Know that your lifes gonna be full of quirky coincidences.
Try to read more often.
Choose friends on how they are on the inside , not how much they seem like you on the outside.
Try and be more organized.
Confide in only those whom you trust.
Try to be a realist??!??
Realise that the friends who will stick around are those who love you for what you are , relationships where you cant totally be yourself don’t last long.

Well girl you’ve got an amazing life ahead of you , wishing you all the best!!!!

Love,
ME
xxxxxx

Letter to my future self...

I was just wondering what it would be like to create a time capsule; I seriously doubt of myself being of such serious consequence that people would want me to create one!! I also don’t have many things which I feel I should put in a time capsule with me right now, so I thought I should take another spin on this typical high school assignment/or family time capsule project, which is to :
• Write a letter to my future self
Seems like Forbes magazine had a similar idea involving writing an email to yourself to be delivered some time in the future. This website allows you to send emails to yourself anytime in the foreseeable future Future me .

I think I’ll write a letter to my future self ( 10 years from now , I’ll be 35 years old ..seems far enough into the future, cant look any farther into the future than that!!!) .



27th May 2006
Dear FutureMe ,
Hope this letter reaches you in the pink of health and happiness !! Hope you and your family are doing great . So how goes it with you ?

I’m doing alright , I just found out that I’ll have to be in grad school for the fall semester , that’s not too bad gives me time to look around for jobs .Its memorial day weekend and Shakira’s Hips don’t lie is going on 94.1 ZBQ… also aren’t Mary J. Blige’s ‘Without You’ and ‘Bad Day’ by Daniel Powter the coolest songs ?? Listen to them and think of what they remind you of … Taylor Hicks from Birmingham won American Idol .I’d write more about myself and what’s happening right now , but the blog’s got some of it down already …

So enough about me what about you?? Are you working? Where? What as? I hope you’ve found something you like doing or at least something that doesn’t come in the way of doing things that you like doing!!!

So are you married? I hope you are ;to a great guy whom you love and who meets your long list of criterion of what the guy you marry should be like !!??!! I hope you’ve dumped the list I have now, got rid of some criteria and may be added some new ones ?? If you’re not married, chill girl …. No point getting married for the sake of getting married , whatever you do I’m with you , just be true to yourself as much as possible , and try not to hurt your folks too much in the process!!

So where in the world are you ? Did you move back to India, back to Dubai, back to the southern hemisphere? Still in America???

My completion of the 100 things to do list seems to have come to a standstill… I hope you’ve done at least a few more things on the list…. I hope you have more time to yourself than grad student me has had in the past 2 and a half years…

So have you started driving or do you still use public transport? I hope you haven’t cut your hair too short , I hope you keep in touch with your old friends… gosh , how many people do you know that I don’t know yet ?????Do you still blog? I’ve been really bad at being a veggie and working out , I hope you’re doing a much better job .

On a less personal note, I wonder how much the world has or can possibly change in 10 years , what’s the weather like now? How many new gizmos have come out ? Who’s the President of the US? What’s happening in India?……. last year hurricane Katrina struck, it’s the age of the ipod, Dubya is president , and that whole reservation thing is happening in India….. …
Well cant think of anything else to write to you, I just hope you’re happy and achieved what you set out to achieve ..What you really set out to achieve.
Love,
Me
xxxxx



Some random googling led me to this CnH comic strip :

A Strange and Beautiful Flower

What if you slept?
And what if,
In your sleep
You dreamed?
And what if,
In your dream,
You went to Heaven
And there plucked
A strange and
Beautiful flower?
And what if,
When you awoke,
You had the flower
In your hand?

Ah... what then?

-Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Spongy people and such like.....

So I read this article in O magazine , it dealt with the concept of ‘Sponge People’

Here’s the introduction ?!!

You’re talking to someone and suddenly feel tense , angry sad. Why is that ? You wonder. You’re spongy.
– Martha Beck

The article basically deals with “contagious psychological phenomena”, another indicator of how people who give out bad vibes ( and not necessarily by action, this article says by thought even !!) can negatively affect you , and vice versa how encouraging thoughts help you perform better .

All this information just added more dimension to what I already know of as ‘Toxic Relationships’( check out the link if you want to reacquaint yourself with the term), ideally I wouldn’t get into one, but if I did; as soon as I realize that maintaining the relationship was far more trouble than the relationship was worth I would probably end it ( does this sound selfish ? Maybe the sentence comes off sounding like that but this is what most experts suggest we ought to do) .

What really gets to me about the above mentioned relationships is that apart from the obvious emotional, spiritual and mental toll, I’ve noticed that when I interact with people who test my patience , I take sadistic pleasure in trying as much as possible ( given my nature) to get back at them, you know being obnoxious or doing things I would not do to anyone else; but just because of the way the person was behaving that was so totally asking for it , I some times have to stoop to their level , I know that by doing so I only bring myself down, and become a lesser person ,so that’s why I don’t like the effect such people have on me , basically got sponged into doing so!!!

Conversely when I meet people who are genuinely nice , or cheery or plain genuine!!! I probably would be on my best behavior and reciprocate their niceness ,or you know even if lacking any positive qualities they don’t posses negative ones I’ll still be rather civil,
I just wish there was a way I could be civil with all those negative people, whom I now realize I probably have to encounter at every stage of life!!! I swear sometimes they just drive me up the wall!!!!

Does this entry seem personal?? It isn’t!!! It’s just about a phenomenon I know truly exists!!!!!

decoded....

Has the entire world gone Da Vinci code crazy??? I knew it had when I saw a magazine cover story about the Da Vinci code Diet in the check out aisle of the neighbourhood supermarket. And the book section contained atleast five books dealing with Dan Brown’s book. I was half tempted to buy the Special Illustrated Edition, (the Angels and Demons special edition was my introduction to Dan Brown ), but I already have a roadside Indian copy back home ( which was where I finally read the book , Dec 2005). Can I buy the book Ma? This one’s got pictures even…

Lazy, Hazy, Crazy Days of Summer

Well, it’s done then. I just handed in my last assignment for this semester…. Now I have 3 months of glorious summer to look forward to …. Happiness is me !!!!

Wow, I can hardly decide where to start,

I have to get down to reading the books I’ve collected over the course of this past year. Have to complete The Bronze Horseman, Conversations with God , Memoirs of a Geisha ,The World is Flat, Tao of Pooh , Te of Piglet as well as the other books lying in my cupboard. Other books in my reading list would be Love in the time of Cholera , Zahir by Paulo Coelho , I want to read Pirsig once again; also have to read the Fifth Discipline once again, hopefully read some more Maya Angelou , yes I wont be a stranger to the public library anymore ...( reading suggestions welcome )

Get back to working out .

Clean up the apartment!!!

Back to veganism and detox .. yup I think I can do a better job now that school’s out .

Watch TV… watch some good movies … since I got this laptop haven’t seen a movie in like forever.. saw Spanglish on HBO recently though…it’s a good movie ….

Try and improve my blogging skills.
Try and improve my cooking skills ???? Maybe not , not one of the ‘funner’ things on this list .
Travel a bit hopefully.

OMG , return calls and log on to messenger , I’ve been so “swamped” I haven’t gotten back to or called up any of my friends in about 3 months …should do so his weekend …


Watch VH1 or listen to the radio, I know that some good new songs have come out in the past six months !!


I think I’ll miss the long holiday part of student life a lot, though when you have a job you hopefully don’t carry work back home with you, unlike the situation in grad school!!

This reminds me of something a wise bear once said ,“Don't underestimate the value of doing nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering.”. Well, I don’t know if this out of context, but I can do a lot of “doing nothing and just going along” for a while.

Of course I will be working over the break. But I look forward to the few “lazy, hazy, crazy days of summer” I have in the interim, of course it would take a separate post to go back to the last real “Lazy/Crazy days of summer” , summer break was so much fun during high school!!!

Wanted...

Avid listener …
Has to listen to a boring, long winded story (it’s so long it’s an epic probably consisting of three to four separate books!!!)….
Has to provide direction….
Has to empathise and totally understand what advertiser is talking about
Based on long ,boring story has to confirm with advertiser that she is absolutely right …
Needs to indulge in catty conversations with placer of ad… advertiser misses being a B!T$H…

Promises not to leak out placer of ad’s skeletons in the closet ….
Needs to dispense sensible advice ….
Should not have any problems of their own, so that they can worry totally about my “problems”…

Just sending my ad out to the Universe … yeah I know… I know ..I’m not lacking for friends … but for the last few weeks I've just been bursting with things to say…. Soul mate/ kindred spirit … Where are you ..when I need you ??!!! ???

80's Forever

"We are the children of the Eighties. We are not the first "lost generation"; in fact, we think we know just where we stand - or are discovering it as we speak. We are the ones who played with Lego Building Blocks when they were just building blocks and gave Malibu barbie crewcuts with safety scissors that never really cut. We collected garbage Pail Kids and Cabbage Patch Kids and My Little Ponies and Hot Wheels and He-Man action figures and thought She-Ra looked just a little bit like I would when I was a woman. Big Wheels and bicycles with streamers were the way to go, and sidewalk chalk was all you needed to build a city. Imagination was the key. It made the Ewok Treehouse big enough for you to be Luke and the kitchen table and an old sheet dark enough to be a tent in the forest. Your world was the backyard and it was all you needed. With your pink portable tape player, Debbie Gibson sang back up to you and everyone wanted a skirt like the Material Girl and a glove like Michael Jackson's. Today, we are the ones who sing along with Bruce Stringsteen and The Bangles perfectly and have no idea why. We recite lines with the Ghostbusters and still look to The Goonies for a great adventure. We flip through T.V. stations and stop at The A Team and Knight Rider and Fame and laugh with The Cosby Show and Family Ties and Punky Brewster and what you talkin' 'bout Willis? We hold strong affections for The Muppets and The Gummy Bears and why did they take the Smurfs off the air? After school specials were only about cigarettes and step-families, the Mr. Rodgers was nothing like Barney, and aren't the Power Rangers just Voltron reincarnated? We are the ones who still read Nancy Drew and the Hardy Boys, the Bobbsey Twins, Beverly Clearly and Judy Blume, Richard Scary and the Electric Company. Friendship bracelets were ties you couldn't break and friendship pins went on shoes - preferably hightop Velcro Reebox - and pegged jeans were in, as were Units belts and layered socks and jean jackets and jams and charm necklaces and side pony tails and just tails. Rave was a girl's best friend; braces with colored rubberbands made you cool. The backdoor was always open and Mom served only red Kool-Aid to the neighborhood kids- never drank New Coke. Entertainment was cheap and lasted for hours. All you needed to be a princess was high heels and an apron; the Sit'n'Spin always made you dizzy but never made you stop; Pogoballs were dangerous weapons and Chinese Jump Ropes never failed to trip someone. In your Underoos you were Superman or Wonder Woman or Spider Man and in your treehouse you were king. In the Eighties, nothing was wrong. Did you know the president was shot? Star Wars was not only a movie. Did you ever play in a bomb shelter? Did you see the Challenger explode or feed the homeless man? We forgot Vietnam and watched Tiananman's Square on CNN and bought pieces of the Berlin Wall at the store. AIDS was not the number one killer in the United States. We didn't start the fire, Billy Joel. In the Eighties, we redefined the American Dream, and those years defined us. We are the generation in between strife and facing strife and not turning our backs. The Eighties may have made us idealistic, but it's that idealism that will push us and be passed on to our children - the first children of the twenty-first century. Never forget: We are the children of the Eighties. if this is familiar, you are one of us... pass it on to all the others... May God's blessings of true happiness be upon each of us in every endeavor we undertake and in every circumstance we encounter."
-Author Unknown

Music to my ears...

Who doesn’t have a song that means much more to them than just the lyrics? May be a song you associate with a certain period of your life or with certain people… there are a few songs that I listen to and it feels like they were written just for me …as a matter of fact I could have written them myself!!! I don’t begrudge musicians their millions ..they deserve them!!! Their work hold such meaning and bring such joy to so many people.


I was trying to recall songs that hold special significance for me, it wasn’t easy, songs which I thought were the epiphany of life and love just sound plain corny now!!!
Anyway here I’ll list a few significant ones.

To start with , Heaven by Bryan Adams. This song doesn’t have much of personal significance, I just remember seeing the video on TV as a fourteen year old and deciding that it was my favorite song ..and it remains one of my favorites, though recent remixes of the song put me off at times!

Next in line would be Brit pop songs of the early 90’s . This takes me back to my childhood in Dubai , with FM 92, Chesney Hawkes, Jesus Jones , Rick Astley and Amy Grant ( she’s American though).When I used to listen to the FM then, it wasn’t because I turned on the radio, it was because dad had it on while driving , or mom had it on while doing her morning chores ….( I could go on and on about the FM and its place in my childhood .. but I’ll just say that Dubai was the one place where I could listen to current hits from ALL over the world – and I mean all over , here in the States you just listen to current American hits or Brit songs that reach here after 5-6 months or songs from Australia that probably take even longer to reach, and if I didn’t make an effort to search on the web I’d be clueless about the current Indian chart busters. )

There are a few Hindi songs I like but I’ll mention Chalte Chalte .Before joining undergrad this was just another song from a movie with Simi Garewal that was probably a massive hit when my mom was a teenager , I would have never thought it would show up in such a list ..but that all changed after undergrad ….
I studied away from home and lived in a hostel the four years of my Bachelors. In our hostel it was almost a ritual for the batch preceding the outgoing seniors to sing Chalte Chalte , and believe me there was hardly a dry eye amongst those 50 graduating seniors , when we were in first and second year and just waiting for the day when we could leave that town and college , we found this highly amusing , it was almost as if the third years wanted to make the seniors cry!!! But when I did eventually reach my fourth year , as expected the juniors sang this song , and all of us did start weeping , I mean for four years we were each others family and after a few months Heaven knows if we would ever meet up again….. Well its been almost four years since I graduated from undergrad ,and I pretty much know what all those girls are having for dinner today!!! Ok ok I don’t know that but ….yea I think that idea of never seeing each other again didn’t quite work out!

Any way because I’m feeling senti I’ll post the lyrics …

"Chalte Chalte Mere Ye Geet Yaad Rakhna
Kabhi Alwida Na Kehna
Rote Hanste Bas Yoon Hi Tum Gungunate Rehna
Kabhi Alwida Na Kehna

Pyar Karte Karte Hum Tum Kahin Kho Jaayenge
In Hi Baharon Ke Aanchal Mein Thak Ke So Jaayenge
Sapnon Ko Phir Bhi Tum Yoon Hi Sajaate Rehna
Kabhi Alwida Na Kehna...

Beech Raah Mein Dilbar Bichhad Jayen Kahin Hum Agar
Aur Sooni Si Lage Tumhe Jeevan Ki Yeh Dagar
Hum Laut Aayenge Tum Yoon Hi Bulate Rehna
Kabhi Alwida Na Kehna... "
*sniff* *sniff*



Incidentally while searching for the lyrics I chanced on a site which has literal English translations of Hindi songs , most of the translations are of the newer lot of movies; the good songs are as good as ever ..the funny ones are downright hilarious ;) check it out @ BollyWhat??? They did a good job of translating the songs from Kabhi Kabhie.

Moving on, I Miss You by Blink 182 ,reminds me of Wellington , it was one of the songs that was on the airwaves while I was there , extremely catchy and I have good memories of irritating friends with the song!!!

I cringe as I write this , but I admit there are a couple of Michael Learns to Rock songs were literally life support for a few months … I believed they held special meaning … I have nothing against MLTR , they are good musicians .. the songs were Complicated Heart and Someday…. I’m sooooo over those songs now …I change the station when they come on…… but maybe one of you will find some meaning in them…..

A good love song is Picture by Sheryl Crow and Kid Rock , a mix of Country and Rap/Rock (or whatever the genre of songs it is that Kid Rock belongs to ).

Have I mentioned that I like The Eagles?? The Best of Eagles album takes me back to first year of undergrad.


Given my Crimson Tide connections, I have to say that after a year and a half of living somewhere near The Strip, Sweet Home Alabama By Lynyrd Skynyrd will have a place in my heart …..

I’ll end with some notable mentions :) …. Bruce Springsteen doesn’t ever get it wrong , Just another day without you by Jon Secada, Mariah Carey is an inspiration( she’s been around since ’91 and she’s still going strong!!) ….And finally, Old Hindi songs from the 60’s and 70’s ..Because they remind me of Mom , Dad and Annu Kapoor LOLLL!!!

Why do people blog???

Actual Conversation I just had with my mother tonight :

Mom: Hey you know that family function I just went to in remote village in India , third cousin XYZ , she came and told me she reads your blog and that you write well.
Me: WHAT!!! Third cousin XYZ knows I maintain a blog ? she read my blog ? how ? why ? what …. Darn!!!!! ( don’t get me wrong third cousin XYZ is a cool gal, i’ve spoken to her a few times , but I’ve never kept in touch after leaving India and there wasn’t anyway she would know of my whereabouts let alone blog.... though I’m happy she read it and said nice things about it to my mom).
ME: So how did she know I have a blog ?
Mom: Your friend who’s her friend showed it to her.
Me: Oh!!! (I didn’t even think my friend read the blog , well now I know….)
Me: Yea ,Mummy I try to keep this blog impersonal , just write general stuff..
Mom : Yea , don’t give out personal info , like your name and stuff….
Me : (Thinking) Ooops!!!
Me: (also thinking): Ok not only have I scared away a sizeable number of people with my ideas, my relatives also know about it!!! …my poor parents …no no not poor parents …they have a daughter who maintains a decent blog . .they should be proud!!!

Incidentally, my parents can’t read this blog at home , some internet firewall problem . I’m sure they wouldn’t mind the stuff I put in , but I’m sure I would get some comments about keeping my opinions to myself , also I doubt if I would write about soul mates if I knew my dad was reading this!!

What Wikipedia says about personal blogs
In common speech, the term blog is often used to describe an online diary or journal, such as LiveJournal which was one of the earliest uses of blogs. The blog format allows inexperienced computer users to make diary entries with ease. People blog poems, prose, illicit thoughts, complaints, daily experiences, and more, often allowing others to contribute. In 2001, mainstream awareness of online diaries increased dramatically.
Online diaries are part of the daily lives of many teenagers and college students. Friends use blogs to communicate with each other, keeping each other up-to-date with events and thoughts in a non-intrusive manner. The appeal of this form of communication is that the recipient can read whenever it is convenient, and the writer does not need to remember who still needs to be updated with certain pieces of information - it is there, waiting, for whenever people wish to read it.

And I had a similar conversation with my friends earlier this evening . So what makes people blog… write about happenings in their life , how they view the world and everyday events, for everyone with an internet connection with a remote interest to see…
The way I see it . ....these are the reasons I blog ….
I didn’t join the blogging bandwagon for a long while , I felt I wouldn’t have anything remotely interesting to write , in retrospect I wish I had , would have been to nice to maintain a blog while I was in New Zealand, my earlier blog was a personal one I wasn’t too worried about that one . I honestly didn’t expect anyone apart from parents ,sibling and a few well meaning friends to read it ,served as a personal journal of sorts and yes I did go on occasional personal rants, mom used to read it , I wonder if she knew what I was talking about …

Cut to the new blog … the way I see it people have so much to say ..but you don’t find people who are willing to listen ..so you frame your thoughts as a journal entry just to send out to the universe , however as it happens the only people out there in the universe interested in reading the entry would be people somehow connected to you …so the stuff you are quite comfortable sending out to the universe gets read by folks you would probably think four times before saying the same thing to , sounds like a contradiction doesn’t it … .

I guess primarily I do it for myself , to brush up my writing skills, like a hobby I like doing , sometimes to write about something I’m honestly interested about that I would no way bring up in normal conversation ..(refer soul mate entry)!! If I get feedback its good because I know other like minded people exist and that I’m not the only one . Designing the layout ,links list, thinking up templates…. just the fact of owning your own bit of cyberspace is appealing ….


I also appreciate the comments, the fact that people read and give feedback on what I write is more than icing on the cake ...definitely keeps me writing ….

While I stick by pretty much all I write, I think without ever having spoken to me making character assessments based on what I have posted online is not the way to go … however if you have serious disagreements with what I post (can anyone have serious disagreements with the stuff I post??) then I agree, I probably would not get along well with you … the same way if you totally agree with the stuff I write ( can anyone totally agree with what I write ???) , unless I know you from some other place as well….. I don’t foresee us becoming best friends.


Maybe I’m blowing things out of proportion, I read the blogs my friends maintain …. For me reading their blog entry is just like having an online discussion … holds no more depth than that .. so I guess in retrospect I guess should feel glad that cousin XYZ took the time to read my few lines penned out for the universe, and thought it good enough to tell my mother about it …and anyway I shouldn’t worry about friends and relatives reading this blog ..What about the people I surely wouldn’t want to read stuff about me ? For all you bloggers and other online type people here are some safety hints:
Safety Hints for Bloggers

please no comments about the link, but it seemed like one of the better ones, the author says such things happen rarely, but yeah she tells us to be a bit careful while posting.....

How Cute!!

Drifter..

I don’t know..... I guess that to succeed in life you need some drive; a dose of killer instinct, at least give a fig about what people think about you and at least make an effort to keep up with the Joneses ….“unfortunately” I’m past all that …I think I’ve been like that for a long time, I would go as far as to say that I’ve been born like that!!!


I don’t know if I’m a drifter , but I know when I don’t like the particular place in life I’m in…. past experience shows that I usually catch the next bus out… maybe I was passionate about a few things in my life. I’ve however moved on to a stage where right now , at this present moment …I don’t really know what drives me to keep going… it’s a bit sad really ….

Maybe getting a degree or finding a job should be my passion right now , I have a vague idea about what job I’d like to be doing in the future, but in the meanwhile I wouldn’t mind washing dishes or flipping burgers, okay maybe I would mind..(Only because I’d get bored with it soon enough)…. Believe it or not all that has happened in my life so far has been pretty much luck, go with your gut kind of stuff….. I have a lot of faith in my gut instinct!!! Right now my intuition isn’t telling me much … I wish it would. I need some direction right about now, but when what you want from life is different from most people you know, sometimes you end up getting confused …

I don’t value material possessions much , yeah I like shopping ,it serves as therapy for me , I usually buy stuff I like ,if it’s good I don’t mind paying extra for it , I like the independence and freedom money would give to satisfy my immediate desires i.e. food, clothing, shelter, books and music( not in that order). But I don’t need a swanky car or a swanky home ….those are things I don’t aspire for…That’s one thing I know for sure … I really don’t get along well with people who place a premium on material possessions , maybe because I’m such a hermit myself …. So that’s one thing I know I don’t want …

… Power doesn’t excite me at all … what’s with power!! I don’t want to assume responsibility for or over other people, I have a hard time looking after myself as it is!!!

… May be knowledge , yes that’s a good driving force , but honestly I don’t harbor Nobel prize intelligence or aspirations….


… people … well when it comes down to it , I really consider everyone my equal , irrespective of age , religion, color, caste ,class , nationality, date of birth, region of India , America, China or Germany they hail from,sexual orientation, dietary preference,..( what other ways of classifying people do we have??).. How do I know this??.. well one thing that has been right with my life has been the opportunity to really interact with people from different walks of life… and what I’ve learnt from that is people are really all the same.. and not to look up to; or look down on anyone … the folks who get their hands dirty so that you don’t have to, folks you meet when you travel by bus … KSRTC in India , greyhound in America , my Hindi movie star “uncle” if you ask I’ll tell you who it is ( no I haven’t met him or spoken to him , but my mom and aunt talk to his elder sister ..She’s how I’m related to him) and I’ll give you a hint his surname is Khan and he recently had a hit movie!! (I know I’ve always been a bit of a showoff this way!!!! gottto stop!!!)) ,Teachers, the Hindus, Muslims , Christians , Jews , Parsis , Sikhs, Buddhists ,Atheists , pagans and Goths and members of their myriad sub sects I’ve gotten to meet in this journey ; some albeit for a short while …you know how it goes… just get out of your comfort zone.. of people just like you .. to find out that outside guess what???
The rest of the world ain’t that much different from the other people in your life..

Now you might think that’s easy for me to say , but to everyone out there the only reason you haven’t had the opportunity to explore is because you haven’t let yourself! You don’t need to get on a plane to broaden your world view , just think about all the things around your world right now that you’ve closed out, it could be anything from blocking a particular type of music , or a particular type of dress, or food or a particular “type” of people…

You know at times like this I wish I had a master plan ,something to work toward, may be do something so that in the end I could tell people “Look at me , look what I’ve done!!!” but I don’t want to do that , what’s the point of living your life to prove something to other people , I’m sure that would drive me into depression… well I guess I’m not too stressed out with life the way it is now .. I guess I have got something down right …. But I just wish I knew where I was heading!!!!!!

Searcher

Some people do not have to search -
They find their niche early in life and rest there,
seemingly contented and resigned.
they do not seem to ask much of life,
sometimes they do not seem to take it seriously.
At times I envy them, but usually I do not understand them.
Seldom do they understand me.

I am one of the searchers.
there are, I believe, millions of us.
We are not unhappy, but neither are we really content.
We continue to explore life,
hoping to uncover its ultimate secret.
We continue to explore ourselves, hoping to understand.

We like to walk along the beach -
We are drawn by the ocean, taken by its power,
its unceasing motion,
its mystery and unspeakable beauty.
We like forests and mountains,
deserts and hidden rivers,
and the lonely cities as well.
Our sadness is as much a part of our lives
as is our laughter.
to share our sadness with one we love is perhaps
as great a joy as we can know ---
unless it be to share our laughter.

We searchers are ambitious only for life itself,
for everything beautiful it can provide.
Most of all we want to love and be loved.
We want to live in a relationship that
will not impede our wandering,
nor prevent our search,
nor lock us in prison walls;
that will take us for what little we have to give.
We do not want to prove ourselves to another
or to compete for love.

We are wanderers, dreamers and lovers --
lonely men and women who dare to ask of life
everything good and beautiful.
Those who are too gentle to live among wolves.

–James Kavanaugh